This is our journey..
After five years of marriage I was finally ready to change gears from a hectic career to begin the process of "attempting" to become pregnant. This had always been my plan (or so I thought). Work and travel and then, when it was time, take a part-time "fun job" and get busy!
I took my fun job as a Recreation Leader at a community center, planning parties and teaching dance classes to children. I assumed we would have our 2 children, a boy and a girl and be one perfect family of four.
Amazingly it took us just 6 months of trying and we were pregnant! Our excitement built as we told our family and saw that little heartbeat at 9 weeks. I think I must have taken 5 pregnancy tests and even bought a few maternity clothes. It was shortly after my tenth week that I started spotting.
I knew something was wrong when my mild morning sickness vanished and I began to bleed heavily. I went for another ultrasound and that little heartbeat was gone. As you might imagine, my husband and I were crushed.
It took over 10 months to conceive again. It is a hard thing to pass your due date and not be welcoming a new baby and not to even be pregnant again. But we kept hoping, and sure enough we were expecting again and saw yet another healthy heart beat. Nine months later we welcomed our first son into the world
Just a short 8 months later, we were unexpectedly pregnant again. We were thrilled. By this time I knew I wanted more than two children as the baby bug had bitten my husband and I and we were sure we wanted a full house! Again, we saw the heartbeat and once again were met with the awful news that we were losing another baby at 11 weeks. As a result of the late stage of pregnancy, I underwent a D & C. Again, we were devastated.
Shortly after the surgery we were surprised to find ourselves with yet another pregnancy! I was so thrilled, yet apprehensive, so we waited to tell anyone of this pregnancy for fear we would have to share the bad news again. And yet, when I began spotting and losing this baby, we told everyone anyways. We decided that sorrow is better shared among those who love you.
I was worried I would never have another child. I was so blessed to have my son, but this also made me realize what I was missing. My Dr. wisely encouraged us to have genetic testing done to see if there were any potential genetic factors involved. And sure enough, I have a rare genetic defect, a Robertsonian Trans location of the 13th and 14 th chromosome. Devastating news when the odds are that I have a 2/3 chance of miscarriage for each subsequent pregnancy. Thankfully it didn't seem hard for us to get pregnant, just hard to stay pregnant.
As miracles have it, mercy reigned in our lives and we were blessed with four more precious babies and only one other early miscarriage. We beat the odds. I am thankful for my nine pregnancies and I grieve my four babies I lost, one of which I know was a baby boy. This grief was the greatest I have ever suffered and gave my husband I a great love and respect for the preciousness of life.
I took my fun job as a Recreation Leader at a community center, planning parties and teaching dance classes to children. I assumed we would have our 2 children, a boy and a girl and be one perfect family of four.
Amazingly it took us just 6 months of trying and we were pregnant! Our excitement built as we told our family and saw that little heartbeat at 9 weeks. I think I must have taken 5 pregnancy tests and even bought a few maternity clothes. It was shortly after my tenth week that I started spotting.
I knew something was wrong when my mild morning sickness vanished and I began to bleed heavily. I went for another ultrasound and that little heartbeat was gone. As you might imagine, my husband and I were crushed.
It took over 10 months to conceive again. It is a hard thing to pass your due date and not be welcoming a new baby and not to even be pregnant again. But we kept hoping, and sure enough we were expecting again and saw yet another healthy heart beat. Nine months later we welcomed our first son into the world
Just a short 8 months later, we were unexpectedly pregnant again. We were thrilled. By this time I knew I wanted more than two children as the baby bug had bitten my husband and I and we were sure we wanted a full house! Again, we saw the heartbeat and once again were met with the awful news that we were losing another baby at 11 weeks. As a result of the late stage of pregnancy, I underwent a D & C. Again, we were devastated.
Shortly after the surgery we were surprised to find ourselves with yet another pregnancy! I was so thrilled, yet apprehensive, so we waited to tell anyone of this pregnancy for fear we would have to share the bad news again. And yet, when I began spotting and losing this baby, we told everyone anyways. We decided that sorrow is better shared among those who love you.
I was worried I would never have another child. I was so blessed to have my son, but this also made me realize what I was missing. My Dr. wisely encouraged us to have genetic testing done to see if there were any potential genetic factors involved. And sure enough, I have a rare genetic defect, a Robertsonian Trans location of the 13th and 14 th chromosome. Devastating news when the odds are that I have a 2/3 chance of miscarriage for each subsequent pregnancy. Thankfully it didn't seem hard for us to get pregnant, just hard to stay pregnant.
As miracles have it, mercy reigned in our lives and we were blessed with four more precious babies and only one other early miscarriage. We beat the odds. I am thankful for my nine pregnancies and I grieve my four babies I lost, one of which I know was a baby boy. This grief was the greatest I have ever suffered and gave my husband I a great love and respect for the preciousness of life.
I share this story with you so you understand why I find being a Doula so very important. I believe that each of us is knitted in the womb by our maker's hands and has a purpose in this life that is important whether we are born or not. For we are all precious in His eyes. As a Doula I am able to take all that I've learned in loss, grief, love, triumph and birth and share that with new expectant mothers. I hope to offer you comfort and guidance to achieve what you envision for the birth of your baby.
My support team
my eyes are filled with tears as i read this Brooke i love your heart and your family's love for God and how you trusted Him with all this and your babies.
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